Jane
Jane is in her late 50s and lost her husband Tony in May last year. He'd been diagnosed with abdominal cancer and died in the hospice.
Jane called RED ARC in October because she just couldn't 'put on a brave face' any more and felt terribly alone. Her RED ARC personal nurse adviser was able to listen and start forming a relationship of trust.
Although Jane has a grown-up daughter who phones her every day, she always tells her that she's fine. She doesn't want to appear weak or put any extra strain on her grieving daughter.
After several emotional conversations, Jane felt that she would benefit from a course of bereavement counselling. RED ARC arranged this for her.
She has now had six sessions and says: 'I knew I needed help but wasn't sure what or how - your nurse has listened and pointed me in the right direction. Everyone was treating me as if things should have gone back to normal and I didn't know where to turn. I still miss Tony very badly but now I don't feel so alone.'
Sam
Sam is 38 and works full time. His father died recently after struggling with lung cancer. They were very close and Sam was finding it hard to come to terms with his death, often breaking down in tears at work.
Sam's line manager got in touch with RED ARC to see if they could help in any way - people at work were at a loss to know how to deal with the situation. The RED ARC nurse adviser had a chat with Sam's manager, giving him general advice and reassurance.
She also told him that Sam could contact RED ARC direct if he'd like to. Two days later Sam phoned and the nurse adviser has been closely in touch with him ever since. She reassured Sam that all his contact with RED ARC would be completely confidential: there would be no feedback to his manager or anyone else.
Sam has now started to see a bereavement counsellor, which was quickly arranged by RED ARC. He said that initially there was a lot of sympathy and support but, as time passed, people around him moved on with their lives and expected him to have too. He felt they were embarrassed by him showing his feelings - and some even avoided him. The counsellor reassured him that this was completely normal and things would slowly improve, and he would benefit from sharing his thoughts and anxieties with the counsellor.
Sam is still very sad but feels more in control now. He says he's grateful for the help he received from RED ARC and also to his manager who pointed him in the right direction.
We provide literature and documents so you can let your employees and line managers know about RED ARC, in case they find themselves in a similar situation.
